The research is clear.
Smartphones are not the smartest idea for kids.
Smartphone and social media usage is making kids distracted, disconnected, unsafe, unhealthy, and depressed. (Dumb phones that call or text but don’t have internet or social media apps seem fine, though.)
Smartphones and the social media apps on them are designed to addict us, and kids’ brains just aren’t ready to handle it. But the social pressure to get and misuse a smartphone can feel impossible to resist.
That’s where we adults come in.
No matter how much our kids may beg us for a smartphone or social media (and they will), we can choose to delay.
So parents at The Museum School started this initiative and are pledging to try our best to delay giving our kids access to social media and/or smartphones—hold the smartphone—until our kids are ready. Many experts recommend most kids wait at least until high school.
JOIN THE PLEDGE
We all want our kids to feel happy and included, so the stronger the peer pressure is on our kids, the more we may want to give in, and holding off may not be easy. But it’ll be a lot easier if we do it together.
Together, we can create a different norm at TMS. We can lower the social pressure to start scrolling at an early age so our kids can develop social skills offline first.
If you think delaying social media and/or smartphones might make sense for one or more of the kids in your family, please consider joining this pledge.
Research and Recommendations
“A majority (53%) of kids have their own smartphone by the time they are 11, and 69% have one at age 12. The number of 8-year-olds with phones grew [from 11% in 2015] to 19% in 2019.
— Common Sense Media
“Researchers collected survey data on 4,584 students in grades 3, 4 and 5 between 2014 and 2016. Overall, 9.5 percent of children reported being a victim of cyberbullying. Children who owned cell phones were significantly more likely to report being a victim of cyberbullying, especially in grades 3 and 4.”
— American Academy of Pediatrics
“Adolescent social media use is predictive of a subsequent decrease in life satisfaction for certain developmental stages including for girls 11–13 years old and boys 14–15 years old.”
— U.S. Surgeon General
“A new TikTok account set up by a 13-year-old user that views and likes content about body image and mental health will be recommended that content every 39 seconds. Experts have warned that such content can have a damaging effect on teens’ mental health, even where it does not explicitly promote eating disorders.”
— CCDH (Center for Countering Digital Hate)
“Far easier to show is the damage to a specific class of people: Adolescent girls, whose rates of depression, anxiety, and self-injury surged in the early 2010s, as social-media platforms proliferated and expanded….Social media—particularly Instagram, which displaces other forms of interaction among teens, puts the size of their friend group on public display, and subjects their physical appearance to the hard metrics of likes and comment counts—takes the worst parts of middle school and glossy women’s magazines and intensifies them.”
— The Atlantic
“There has been an uptick in daily teen internet users, from 92% in 2014-15 to 97% today. In addition, the share of teens who say they are online almost constantly has roughly doubled since 2014-15 (46% now and 24% then).”
— Pew Research
“The end of 2012 was the first time that the majority of Americans owned a smartphone [and teen social media use increased from about 50% to about 80%]….and in 36 countries around the world, adolescent loneliness began to increase after 2012, just like it does in the U.S. data….in the U.K., in Australia, in Canada, exact same pattern for teens for anxiety and depression, self harm, unhappiness. It’s very, very consistent.”
….So I have three kids. We have tried to delay the smartphone as long as possible and to delay social media even further. And I do think that is a good idea. If the kid really needs a phone, get him a flip phone. Get him a pared down smartphone, like a Gabb phone, where you can text, talk, and take pictures, and that’s it. There’s no ability to download social media or access the internet.”
— Researcher and Psychologist Jean Twenge in a New York Times Audio interview with Ezra Klein
"I have talked to hundreds of parents," Cherkin explains, "and no one has ever said to me, 'I wish I gave my kid a phone earlier or I wish I'd given them social media access sooner. Never."
…"Parents set themselves up for a constant struggle when a child starts having their own smartphone, Cherkin says. "It's the dopamine you're fighting. And that's not a fair fight. So I tell parents, 'Delay all of it just as long as you can,'" she emphasizes.
—Emily Cherkin, MEd, in an interview with NPR
“There’s only one correct answer if you want them to lead happier, more successful lives, says Yale University psychology professor Laurie Santos: “Wait as long as possible.”
— In a CNBC interview
Why smartphones?
Why not just delay social media?
Good question. In short, it’s just easier this way.
Research shows that when a kids gets a smartphone, it’s not long before they get on social media—with or without parental consent.
And data from our own school backs this up.
To most kids, a smartphone is effectively just a social media device. Unlike most adults, they generally aren’t interested in using it for email or driving directions.
But kids can stay connected without a smartphone! A dumb phone (a phone without the internet access) can be a great, healthy alternative to a smartphone because a kid can use it to call or text with their friends and with you, but they can’t put social media apps on it.
Even if your family chooses to get your kid a smartphone and just focus on trying to delay social media specifically, this pledge can still apply to you.
Not sure about joining the pledge just yet? That’s okay! Every kid is different and every family has different needs. This is a judgment-free initiative.
And please reach out if you’d like to share your ideas, questions, or reservations. Let’s have a conversation among TMS parents with a wide range of perspectives.